Light Dwarf - Wacky Submitions

posted: 19 June 2004
Game: Warhammer 40,000
Players: Ryan playing Tau vs Jeff MaGee playing Death Company, Light Dwarf Commenting

So...

Late in the game, a Rhino had performed a successful flanking maneuver, deploying its load of Death Company infantry alongside a group of sharpshooting Tau who were, as usual, hiding behind cover and praying to their gods that the rubble would suck up any incoming fire. Unfortunately for those poor Tau, they weren't counting on being assaulted by ten well oiled killing machines. How could they not count on that? It's all that Death Company armies do! I think the Murphy's Luck factor here is that he ended up playing you, and an army so unaccepted as being anything like balanced that it's listed as 'Trial Rules' and even the liberal Canadian Tournament system that'll practically let you use an army list that one of the Games Designers suggested on the 'net, still doesn't allow this army to be used. The Death Company army is designed for players who don't anything as complicated as tactics or strategy. It's the Gobot in a Transformers world.

Luckily my turn was next, and in a move of pure spite I decided: "Hey, what the hell, let's tank shock the Broadside with that empty Rhino." I'm sure you can guess what happened next. With the Rhino next to the Broadside, you realized that an army painted more than two colours can look pretty good?

My opponent, in what can only be considered a ridiculous move, decided that it was Death or Glory time and gave the Rhino what for - (that is kinda dumb, since he passed his Leadership test (allowing him to make that Death or Glory attack), he moves to the side of the Rhino. His turn being next, he still would have had a shot at the Rhino, but without the downside of being killed if he missed. But i can imagine his over-excitement of the odds being in his favour of destroying the Rhino clouded his foresight. So, if it was a ridiculous move, it wasn't really a Murphy's Luck kind of story, just your opponent being stupid. But, since the odds were on his side for destroying the Rhino, i guess it still counts.) only for some reason that poor Broadside pilot must've had an itch in his unmentionables - the Broadside failed to hit... and Little Ryan the Retarded Space Marine who was made a tank driver because he couldn't remember to tie up his boots (Space Marine boots don't have laces) ran down the Broadside... and man did my opponent cry like a little girl.

So, there's my story, and hopefully you like it enough to wet yourself (not in the past 30 years... is this common in your gaming group?) thinking about the sad, droopy face that I got to look at for the rest of the game.

Needless to say, we've never ever had that rematch... I think it's got something to do with that Broadside pilot and his unmentionables... Yeah, that's it...


	WACKY SUBMISSIONS - MURPHY'S LUCK Everyone has a bad gaming or hobby experience. We want you to tell us about some of yours so that we can have a good laugh. Do not send us regular stories of how you lost to your buddy. We want the extreme... See below for examples. To make your story/submissions seem more official please get the other people involved to collaborate on your story. One person's Murphy's Luck can be their opponents glory. We like to get different views of all the action or non-action. Adding pictures of you or your units in bad luck can tell your story even better. Hey... your Murphy's Luck could even be a hobby related disaster. So share, so everyone can laugh at your misfortune. Please visit the Reach Us page or the main Wacky Submissions page to get info on submissions.


	Posted: 26 July 2004 Game: Warhammer Players: Nick Appleby Orc & Goblins vs ? (ashamed by what happened and does not want to named) playing Chaos Hello all, Here be the tale of the most satisfying game I ever lost. It started badly with a borrowed Orc and Goblin army facing up to the rampant frothing of a Khornate Chaos army, consisting of a Lord of Khorne on demon steed, eight chosen Knights of Khorne, three chariots of Khorne with an aspiring champion of khorne in one, and to top it off, a giant and a shaggoth. With no fast cav, I had no chance of leading this frenzied mob around by their nose, and prepared for the bloody conflict ahead. The first turn brought my first bit of joy, as the Elite chosen knights with lord charged five snotling bases, failed to kill them all, and in return the snotlings wounded twice, and there was the first snake eyes of the game. Two knights toppled to the ground with a look of confusion on their faces. The next three turns held little joy, as my army slowly melted before the frothing maniacs but in my final turn some more fun was to be had. His Shaggoth charged ten Orc Arrer Boyz. I chose to stand and shoot, passed the relevant terror test and managed to inflict a wound on it's way in. Muscles bunching the Shaggoth swung it's mighty axe.....and hit nowt. As I had inflicted a wound, outnumbered him and had a rank, I had won the combat. My opponent rolled his break test, and failed, off runs the Shaggoth a mighty twelve inches, I rolled for pursuit, lo and behold, a double six. Oh how I chuckled. But nevertheless these small victories simply dulled the pain of a nasty and squishy defeat.


	Posted: 21 March 2004 Game: Warhammer Players: John playing Chaos Dwarf vs Bill Murphy playing Skaven When my (Bill Murphy's) Vermin Lord charged a unit of Chaos Dwarfs (John) (in an older edition of Warhammer (because Bill is really old)) he was so big and mean that they fled. The Vermin Lord pursued to run them down and collided into a unit of goblins. The Chaos Dwarfs ran thorugh the goblins as they are a friendly unit to them. In the following round my Vermin Lord kills only one goblin. Well the Goblins have all the rank bonuses and such so they make the Vermin Lord take a leadership test and he fails, runs away, and then was trampled by goblins. The Greater Daemon and God of all Skaven trampled by puny little goblins. Murphy's Luck for sure.